This Post Has No Intrinsic Value

I had a very interesting experience last night.  (Notice the word “interesting” does not connotate “good” here).  After dinner, Chris went upstairs to take a short nap, and after awhile, I went upstairs also.  I was going to put on my swimsuit to work on cleaning the pool filter, then take a swim.

When I went into the bedroom, Chris was awake, so I lay down with him for a moment, just being silly and a little bit annoying.  A little tickling, a little giggling, you know.  Well, Smokey (Jacob’s dog), who always wants to be in the middle of all the action, came bounding up onto the bed, barking and licking.

Now this is not a problem when my 15-lb Charlie does this.  But Smokey is 60 pounds.  And he has a realllly long tongue.  So when he began jumping on us, it pretty much broke up the party.

I sat up, and as I did, I noticed blood on my arm.  “I’m bleeding!”  I said to Chris (I know, I've got a way with words...).  I wiped the sizable amount of blood off my arm to discover the type of wound below, thinking perhaps Smokey’s toenail had scratched me.  Then I noticed there was blood all over my arm and leg.  My stomach did flip-flops.  Eew.

Chris was sitting up by this time, too.  “There’s blood all over the bed!” he exclaimed, and I looked up to see that the bed was indeed covered in splatters of blood. 

I felt like we were in one of those B-rated horror movies where the teenagers are making out, getting all hot and bothered, then suddenly the guy says, “What’s that dripping on my head?”  And the girl turns on the light, and her BEST FRIEND is impaled on the ceiling above them.

Don’t worry, no dead bodies over here. 

Chris, always the doctor, quickly figured out it was Smokey that was bleeding (the trail of blood on the carpet leading to the dog was a fairly telling clue), but considering Smokey is black, it took a moment to figure out where to blood was coming from.  Meanwhile, the blood was literally splashing off his body, hitting the floor, the banisters, ME…

“Must’ve hit an artery…” Chris commented as I found a puncture on his ear where apparently Cocoa had bit him during one of their “disagreements”.  Applying pressure, I called for Carina to come help.  She looked at me rather funny when I asked her to hold Smokey; “Mom, you’ve got blood all over your face.”  Eeew. 

Here's Smokey with his freakish bi-colored eyes...

...and here's a dingo.  See the similarities?

 And then I had another movie flashback.  A Cry in the Dark, with Meryl Streep yelling out “The dingo ate my baby!”  Which may sound like a really strange flashback, but if you read the book (and of course, being the nerd that I am, I did), the court case centered all around this “arterial spray” that was supposedly found in the family’s car.  That phrase, "arterial spray", has haunted me ever since I read it.  (And, freakishly enough, the baby died in 1980, and her death certificate was issued just two weeks ago.) So I was thinking that I had my very own arterial spray going on from my dog’s ear.  Have I said eeew yet?

Fortunately, dogs are hardy creatures, the blood clotted on its own, and Smokey was quickly distracted with the sound of food hitting his bowl downstairs.  Cocoa looked rather sheepish, sniffing his ear and moping around as if she knew she’d been bad.  But, on the other hand, she always mopes around. 

"Look at me.  I'm so sad."